I can remember 9/11 like it happened yesterday. It's a day burned in my memory for many reason that are obvious but one that really stands out is that I remember looking at our 7 month old daughter and thinking,"Oh dear God this is your world you have to grow up in." Wednesday December 2nd brought the same anguish in my heart when my sister in law called me and told me to turn on the T.V. because there was an active shooter in San Bernardino and it appeared that many people had been killed. Knowing my husband would be on scene along with many friends who work for the fire and police department, I sat paralyzed in front of the T.V. trying to get answers just like everyone else in the area. Suddenly my house being cluttered with my kids shoes and school books didn't seem that important. Errands could wait. Being annoyed with my daughter for her bad attitude became small. My phone went crazy as everyone wanted to know Dan was safe and what was going on. We all hate not knowing, not having the answers right away. Why is this happening? Who would do something like this? Are we in danger? When will it end and will there be more victims? My girls are older now and they understand and can wrap their brains around the fact that we live in an imperfect world. They understand there is sin and evil and that this is what we call it. If we are being straightforward, as Christians it doesn't really matter if it's work place violence or domestic terrorism because the bottom line is it is sin and we know sin has a ripple effect that spans so beyond the person involved and this is has a very large span of people it has frightened, hurt and scarred for life. Our youngest looked at me and said,"Mom, I know this is bad and I never want to be involved in something like this but I know God has my exact days numbered and I know when I do die where I'm going." Our oldest who I thought might be changing her mind about going to Spain this summer for a missions trip said,"Satan wants to steal our joy and our security and the word tells us God wants us to not hide our light." So in the midst of overwhelming sadness this week for the victims and their families, and worrying about my husband and all of our friends who were on scene of the shooting and their mental and emotional state, I still don't have the answers to why this couple would do something so hateful and quite frankly what answers would be sufficient? What answers will bring those who were killed back? What answers will erase the memories embedded in the images the first responders saw? What I do know is that when something bad happens and our hearts are hurting I tell the girls to go back to what we know even if we are scared and confused. We know God is good. We know God works all things for the good of those who love Him. We know there is evil and we live in a fallen world BUT that God is bigger. We also know the ending of the story and that is that satan does not win God does. We know that satan has come to steal and destroy and rob of us of our joy and security. But our God has come to give us peace and our joy is in Him not based on our circumstances. As children of God we need to be steadfast in prayer and because we are certain of where we are going we need to love on others and make sure they know that Christ died on the cross for everyone and his grace and mercy are sufficient in all things. Be blessed today knowing He is in control. Come Jesus come!
