Today we had my cousins memorial service at our church. I was sitting there thinking never have I been to a family members funeral. I still have my grandparents and everything. Never have I sat in the "Reserved for Family" two front rows. Never have I ever helped organize and plan a funeral. I have never sat with my entire family and our family friends at a funeral. I can't remember ever seeing my grandma cry. It was hard initially walking in but then as the service unfolded and people spoke from their hearts and Pastor Scott shared from the word; I thought to myself,"God is in control. He has a perfect will and plan and he loves each one of these people sitting here today."

 And at the moment someone raised their hand at Pastor Scott's offer to pray and ask Jesus to be their personal savior and as people were coming up to me at the luncheon afterwards asking me about attending the church I was very thankful.Thankful that even in the midst of my families loss and hurt that my God, my savior stayed true to form and is transforming lives and working behind the scenes to call people to Himself so that none should perish.

I am working to memorize scripture so that it is hidden in my heart and I can stand firm on God's word. My verse for this week; The steadfast love of the Lord never ceases; his mercies never come to an end, they are new every morning. Lamentations 3:22

Blessings.

Ryanne's Time....

In the midst of what our family has been going through with the death of my cousin we tried to continue on and have a "normal" day of celebration for our sweet Ryanne who turned 10 this past weekend. I had planned a little ice cream social for a few of her friends and it turned it very cute.

I took on the task of making all the ice cream home made and for the most part I think I did good with the flavors. I made a lavender lemon that was a hit with most people and my personal favorite. I think I made like 6 or 7 different kinds. I think I am ice creamed out for a while ha!

We had a nail station where Morgan and two of her friends painted all the kiddos nails.....

I just realized I took this group photo and Ryanne is purposely hiding behind her friend.....

We asked Ryanne what she wanted for her birthday and she said,"A day and night in Santa Monica playing at the beach and walking around." So we got a room and did just that.

For those of you that might not know Ryanne as well as we do I wanted to give you glimpse into her heart. I told my mom this story on the phone the other night and couldn't tell it without crying. 

When we were in Santa Monica we decided to eat at this Mexican place down at the end of the pier. There were a lot of homeless people out this past weekend. Some were performing and some were just asking for money. The pier was also lined with street performers doing so many talented things you couldn't even believe some of the singing and instruments that were being played. As we neared the restaurant we spot someone who is clearly homeless and to be honest with you very dirty and possibly in his own world to some degree. He has this puppet out that is just as filthy and he's attempting to make it dance. He has a can out in front for money but nobody is paying him for his talent. As we are standing out in front waiting for our table Ryanne looks at me and says,"Mommy, can you walk back to that one man back there so I can give him some of my own money? Nobody was giving him anything or paying any attention to him." At first I was like, seriously? Then Dan walked her back and she walked right up to this man that everyone else was casting aside and she gave him some of her birthday money. She walked back over to me and said,"Mom, his talent really wasn't so good but I wanted to help him anyway." Dan looked at me and said,"You can't teach that to a child." Nope. we know that comes from the Lord.
We love you Ryanne and are blessed to know you. In all your crazy antics and stunts you pull everyday to get us wondering what on earth we are going to do with you; it's moments like this that reminds me God in all His grace and wisdom has an AMAZING plan for you and your sweet spirit.

We lost my 20 year old cousin this past week. It wasn't something our family saw coming. There were no long drawn out good-byes in the hospital. No final opportunities to have that one last conversation that needed to take place. 

 Just sitting in my aunts living room with family and my cousins friends waiting and watching the clock; waiting for the sheriff to come and confirm what we already knew in our heads to be true. There was no pause button to allow the news to travel from our heads to our hearts. 

As the minutes turned into hours and Thursday night turned into early Friday morning it felt like everything was in slow motion. No parent under any circumstance should outlive their child. It's not the right order of things.

 Death always has me thinking. Thinking about making disciples of Christ. That no one person would get left behind. That no one person would ever not feel the body of believers love. That no one person would not experience Gods peace and comfort. It puts my heart into sheer desperation mode. Desperate to show Gods love to people around me in wherever I can meet their needs. To be the hands and feet of Christ. I cry out,"God make me uncomfortable where I am so I will share who you are with others!"

 I know we can't save people. Gods in the business of saving lives and drawing people to himself. But I desire to not be lazy in the job He has assigned me, and that is to go and make disciples of all nations. (Matt. 28) To never grow weary doing good. (Gal. 6:9) And to realize we are supposed to be pointing people in one direction and that is to spend eternity with Jesus. (Rom. 10:13) 

Praying that God would use my cousins death that many might come to know Him. 

 I read this in my devotional yesterday:

Every trial we face, no matter how difficult; is an occasion to point people to God-given satisfaction that supersedes suffering in this life. 

-David Platt-

4th of July....

I walked in to find this on my dining room wall; Ryanne is counting down to her 10th birthday ha!

What you do when you have energy to spare....

I made mini cherry pies to take to our friends on the 4th....Yum!

Flowers to bless our friends who hosted the swim party....

Gluten and dairy free cookies.....

Morgan made the salad.....

We swam, had some fellowship and food and we were thankful for our freedom for sure...

This guy was hanging out this morning watching me water.....beautiful!

Taking A Deep Breath...Ahhhhhh...

We just spent the last 7 days getting ready for Morgan's end of the year dance show. 7 days of dance with long, late nights. Costumes to prep, toes to wrap, false eyelashes to glue on and LOTS of prayers for no costume malfunctions took place. My counter tops were littered with dresses and tights and shoes and head pieces.

Four out of eight costumes ready to go...

End of the year Thank you gifts for all of her AMAZING teachers at Dance Spectrum who work tirelessly to help these kiddos reach their goals. They love these kids like crazy and really become your second family when your kid is there as much as ours. You share food, stories, help with babies and costumes. The owner and her husband love the Lord and so that thing we have in common, that most important thing has really made an impact in our lives.

Aunts and Uncles and Grandmas drove to Riverside to see her in the Sleeping Beauty Ballet where she danced on pointe as well as her overall work shop performance where she danced in musical theater (her first 60 second costume change mid way through a dance. Picture a Nascar pit stop) she did tap, hip hop, lyrical and Jazz.

She standing on pointe here so NO she is not taller than me yet!

my mom is the brave one who always volunteers with me at all the shows.  Seriously crazy!

Miss Gail stretching the girls before show time. Thanks for a fun weekend Morgan. We are so proud of your good attitude, hard work and sweet spirit. Looking forward to a fun four weeks off before you do it ALL again.