Unless the Lord builds the house, those who build it labor in vain. Psalm 127:1

Saturday, September 8, 2012

"Are You There God It's Me Christy"

Ha! Do you remember that book growing up? "Are you there God, it's me Margaret." If you don't remember that book I am seriously dating myself. Good times.

It has been that kind of week. Ups, downs. Some more downs.

I am caught between supporting my WAY overstressed husband who is trying to do the right thing at work amongst scandal and people causing dissension. And wanting to just go down and slap people upside the head. Ya' the later would feel really good but alas I couldn't find that answer anywhere in scripture this week.

I was sitting at the computer this week getting ready to Google something and a thought popped into my head; wouldn't it be so cool if we could Google God? Like type in a question and *POOF* up pops 1 answer on what we should do in any given situation. Or an answer to prayer that we have been seeking and seeking. I'm not down playing Gods ability to answer us or open doors it's just sometimes the journey there seems so long and daunting.

I want to be content where I am, in this very place but frankly I'm over CA. I'm over the drama of the city my husband works for. I'm over the rat race. I'm kinda just over it.

My husband just enrolled to go back to finish his bachelor's. He's over this place too. To be totally transparent we are praying him finishing school will open a door for us that allows us to exit CA.

I have been struggling with being a stay at home mom. Wait, let me rephrase that; I have been struggling with the attitudes of others who feel being a stay at home mom and home schooling is not as important as working outside the home. There that's better. My mind and heart battle because I know in my heart these girls are our ministry. Dan and I made the commitment even before we were married that we would live inside of our means so I could quit working when our first was born. For me to be present when he often cannot be. My head on the other hand tells me that the world does not place value in eternal things only material things. That I should be doing more! More! More! Then my heart jumps in and says,"More? More than raising and teaching and loving two human beings that are AMAZING little people?" Then my head says,"Yes more. More clout in career, more money, newer cars. Feeling and looking important to those around you." Then my heart says,"NO!"

 I'm pretty sure this post might be a downer without meaning to so here's me switching gears. I mean I want you to come back after all. ;)

Here are the pictures of Ryanne in her circus classes. She takes swinging ladder and trampoline.


Rachel had her up on the silk ribbon. Talk about requiring upper body strength. Whew!

"Hello, God it's me Christy again. Please don't let Ryanne run off and join the circus when she grows up. Ha!"

See this smiley face? She just had two eye teeth pulled. :( She was so good. They almost couldn't get them out and were going to send her to an oral surgeon. The dentist got them though. Thank you God! She was braver than brave. She has to go back next week to have tow more eye teeth pulled. It only slowed her down for a day. She got to lay on the couch and watch cartoons. The lengths my kids will go to just to get a day off school. HA! Good job RY! I knew you could do it baby. So proud of the way you handled yourself even though it was super scary.


BC said...

Yep! Right there with you...I mean right there. If I hadn't fallen in love with the Ocean this during our past two years I might up and move too! Sometimes all the struggle makes you realize Heaven has to be the most amazing place! Sometimes I pray for it to come sooner than later and other times I pray that I get more days here with my kids! Bet God is saying, "Make up your mind lady!" Don't pick the job over your kids - money is so minute compared to them!! Stay home. :)I support you - you are one amazing momma!!

Crystal Keilers said...

Just got caught up. Man, I can't think of anything better than being able to stay home with your children and your husband having of the same priority. You are making intangible deposits all of the time. Some women can't and long to do just that.

And I can't believe anyone would want to leave California (I tell God he tricked me;). xo

littlecbsmom said...

Can I just give you an AMEN!!! Not a downer at all my friend, truth and honesty. I am trying to see my "job" that way too, thanks for the reminder.

Love the circus pictures, what a girl!

Tammy said...

Aaah yes...if only the "slapping upside the head" could be found in scripture. ha! You tickled me silly with that one! I too feel your pain with homeschooling. I get the same reactions, but as you said...your girls are your ministry. Stick with God's plan for them and you. And in the meantime, I'll keep searching for that's just got to be in there somewhere. I'll let you know if I find anything.
So let me get this don't want your daughter being in the circus possibly resulting in a lifetime supply of the best popcorn ever?
Circus popcorn rocks!!
Thanks for the comment on my blog post. I have a feeling we're going to be great blogging friends.

Erica Young said...

Just got caught up and whew you have been busy. Good luck to Dan to going back to school to get his bachelors. And props to you for wanting to be a stay at home mom and do homeschooling. Or should I say for having the means to provide for them and still be able to stay home. I wish I could do that. Maybe in a few years :) Hope you have a good week!